Sparring 2

I've been thinking about my sparring class. It has really brought me to a new level of engagement. We had a sparring class and although this sounds normal I didn't get a whole lot out of them. Anxiety gave me nausea and a stomach ache and a feeling of inadequacy. So when receiving comments my brain would file it away under negative and not constructive comments due to the anxiety I would always feel when sparring. It's hard to put it into words but I want to give it a shot because I know I am not alone in my  old dislike for sparring. I put the qualifier old because I now have this gem of an evening to remember of how much fun I had and how good it felt for the first time ever. so if the anxiety comes back I can reflect on this amazing night and appreciate the value of all the help I have been receiving over the years. I started Kung fu in 1998. So it's been a long time in coming to overcome this apprehension of something so vital to our kung fu. I feel I've taken my next step towards mastery with this momentous occasion. To me this is a really significant turning point in my development where incremental progression has been realized in a positive way for me. My approach to kung fu has grown substantially because of this one night. I can't thank you all enough for helping me get here because this has truly been a group effort of patience and understanding on everyones part. I am truly thankful for all the feedback.I can honestly say I am hearing it with a new set of ears and it is exciting to understand what you all have been telling me for years. Sifu Jeannette Langner

sparring

Had a great class last night. Most of you may not know this about me but I've hated sparring since I've started. It would always make me feel anxious and I would get an upset stomach and It was usually tolerated by me in silence because it is a big part of learning kung fu. I had a class where we all started hitting each other in the face and that was how I was able to break my fear of it but the anxiety always remained. I had my usual reluctance to spar but I did it anyway because this fear I've lived with for so long needs to be put to rest. I am proud to say I sparred with everyone there and not once did I feel anxious or upset in anyway. This was a long road I've had to travel to get to this point where sparring no longer evokes a dread feeling inside of me. I had so much fun last night. I finally see why the others love sparring so much. The sense of safety and security I felt was amazing. I sparred last night and I had fun. To me this is a huge step forward in my training towards mastery because I can now think of sparring in a new light I can remember this night and recall how much fun it was and go forward with a new outlook of optimism. Thank you to all the black belts present for making this such a memorable night for me. I will cherish it always. Sifu Jeannette Langner